one woman's journey to self love and living an awakened life.
I’ve experienced one of the toughest Mercury Retrogrades in years. A mini tornado ripped through my insides stirring up old depressing thoughts which almost seemed believable. And in the world around me, my relationships were also swept up within a tornado of magnified energy and mini conflicts were blasting off all around me.
Everything felt hard. I started to notice conflict almost everywhere in my life, inside of myself and in my external world and relationships. And after a couple of weeks enduring life, I threw up my hands and declared I’d had enough of everyone and was going to retreat away in my bear cave.
Life felt very hard and very serious. I felt like I wasn’t being heard or I was being heard but I was being misunderstood.
However for all my years on this planet I have learnt one thing. When it seems as though it is everyone else that is crazy or frustrating or aggravating, then there is really only one place to point the finger. And that’s towards yourself.
And that’s when the relief came.
I chilled out for a moment and told myself I love you. I repeated it a few times and breathed into my heart. Then I reminded myself that no matter how real and serious this whole life thing seems, it’s actually not real at all. I had disconnected deeply from what is real. I had disconnected from my soul. (Well I probably hadn’t really, but I was no longer looking in the direction of my soul, as I was rooted in ego thinking and fear based ideas).
A Course in Miracles would call that The Holy Instant. Which is referring to the idea that it only takes a second to connect back into your true loving soul energy and to see that same loving soul light in all others. Basically for everything to feel whole and good again.
Yogi’s would call this Namaste, which loosely means ‘the divine light in me honours the divine light in you.‘ And through mercury retrograde I certainly wasn’t seeing the divine light in those around me, which also means I wasn’t seeing it in myself.
So let’s stop getting frustrated with other people and bring the awareness back to ourselves.
Ponder for a moment, what if each conflict in your life was created as a mirror of an inner conflict within yourself?
What would that mean if that were true?
Well all else fails and your world crumbles, there is usually nothing else left to do but to look within.
To look within and face yourself.
'Beauty is truth, truth beauty,'—that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
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~ metaphysical musings and personal growth ~